I’ve gotta tell you, I’m feeling really let down. EN promised us scandalous photos and incriminating videos from David O’s 50th birthday party, but all we got were a few polite tweets from Samantha Clark, like “Ooh, that Jen Carter, her dress was so very pretty.” No!! I wanted to hear, “Ooh, that Jen Carter, her dress was so very pretty–until she ruined it doing a keg stand.”
Oh, well. I may have to start taking on these undercover, after-hours assignments myself. I can see it now:
[Fake delivery man (John in sunglasses and a mustache) wheels giant cake into David’s party.]
David: Wow, Karen, did you order me a cake?
Karen: (confused) No…
David: Well, Happy Birthday to me! Woo-hoo!!
[This is when I jump out of the cake and sing Happy Birthday while wearing a moosehead and waving little Canadian flags. While partygoers are still in shock, I scamper off–but instead of leaving I hide behind a curtain where I spy on everybody for the rest of the night.]
Next time, EN, next time. For now, your news & notes:
Got big plans for tonight? We didn’t think so. Here’s something to look forward to: the PRO Derby Cross in Wellington, Fla., at 7 p.m. (ET). Go cheer for your favorite team in person or watch it on the USEF Network‘s live stream.
Congrats Mark and Missy: The USEF named Capt. Mark Phillips and Missy Ransehousen USEF Coach and Para-Equestrian Coaches of the Year. “Both of these individuals have dedicated their lives to the training of horses and riders,” said James Wolf, USEF Executive Director of Sports Programs. (COTH)
William Fox-Pitt announced that Cool Mountain, with whom he won Rolex and a team gold at WEG in 2010, will not be making an Olympic bid. “He injured a tendon in Germany last year,” Fox-Pitt says. “It’s not very serious, but I am going to give him a whole year off. That would give him the best chance of recovering for the future.” Luckily Fox-Pitt has some other potential Olympic rides in his barn: Oslo and Lionheart, both of whom he’s campaigned since the novice level, and 2011 Burghley winner Parklane Hawk. (BBC Sport)
New Zealand has released its 2012 high performance eventing squad. No surprises here: The list includes Andrew Nicholson (Nereo, Avebury, Mr. Cruise Control, Armada); Clarke Johnstone (Orient Express); Jonathan Padget (Clifton Promise, Clifton Lush); and Mark Todd (NZB Grass Valley, Major Milestone, NZB Land Vision). (Scoop)
Doug Payne reveals his helmet-cam secrets, including why helmet cams are useful–“It’s a great learning tool, if you have a problem you can relive it and figure out exactly what happened and how you might prevent it the next time around. The footage can also come in handy if you have a questionable ruling by an XC jump judge”–what kind you should buy, and how to edit the footage. (Horse Junkies United)
The New York Times is worried that rugby players might endanger the Olympic’s equestrian segments by showing up drunk, rowdy and in the mood for “vodka shots, jelly wrestling and strip pillow fighting.” This is a direct quote from the story: “Later news accounts said the rugby players had engaged in ‘playful’ wrestling with the Australian dwarves, who were not tossed but did race each other through the bar while attached to bungee cords.” You’ve just got to read the rest yourself. (NYT)
The EHV-1 scare in Orange County, Ca., continues. With three new confirmed cases on Wednesday and one on Thursday, the case total has risen to nine. Only one horse displayed neurological symptoms and has been euthanized. The source of the outbreak has not been identified but it is not thought to be connected to California’s 2011 EHV-1 cases. (The Horse)
Bad people doing bad things: A Pennsylvania trainer and riding instructor has been charged with knowingly selling as many as 120 ex-racehorses to a “kill buyer” who took them to Quebec for slaughter. (BloodHorse) In Milton, N.H. a teen rider was injured and a horse was killed as the result of a hit-and-run on a rural road. (WMUR) A Tennessee horse hauler is facing multiple violations in connection with a rollover accident earlier this week that killed three of the 38 horses on his truck. (The Horse) And… a British man who neglected his mare so badly that her hoof fell of, due to laminitis and an untreated infection, had his sentence dropped from 20 weeks to 10 weeks on appeal. (Horse and Hound)
Sometimes, though, justice is served: A cheetah escaped its enclosure in a German zoo and attacked a pony that was being taken for a walk. The pony stopped its attacker with a hoof to the head, at which point the cheetah was sedated with a tranquilizer dart. (Horsetalk)
Move over, Cirque du Soleil, there’s a new show in town: Apassionata is Europe’s most successful equestrian entertainment show, celebrating “the magical connection between people and horses.” From what I gather from the trailer, the show has everything you could possibly ask for: fancy dressage moves, fire-jumping, ladies singing inside giant seashells, horses with sparklers tied to their legs, horse-skiing, a donkey surrounded by teddy bears… you gotta love Europe, they know how to do it up right. The show’s tour is slated to arrive in the U.S. in April with cites/dates to be announced.
Go eventing.
