Trend Alert: Horses

How does someone become a certified member of the EN Team, earn a keycard to the Eventing Nation corporate headquarters, and get a reserved seat engraved with their name at the EN round table?  Most of the time I personally select people I know from the eventing world who are smart and have a good sense of humor.  The other, harder, route is for an aspiring writer to take their chances and send us an email out of the blue, so to speak.  Someday we will be organized enough to hold tryouts.  Tonight’s new writer–Abigail–was in the later category but it only took a couple of emails for me to ask for a writing sample, and I was quite impressed.  What say you Eventing Nation?  This isn’t exactly a democracy, but your opinion does matter.
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From Abigail:

Being an eventer, I have never paid much attention to barn fashion. Growing up I would throw on whatever ratty t-shirt I could reach and head to the barn in my riding tights that my mother threatened to throw away on account of the many holes they sported. I managed to master the stock tie sometime around 2006, and from there my show turnout has vastly improved. I still can’t get the hair net trick down, you know that hunter one where they cover their ears and look so trendy…They really should call it a hair trap. Or maze. Maybe after another decade of shows I’ll figure it out.

Last year I started my freshman year of college. Fashion is a whole different ball game on campus. Here the perfected look is one I like to call “under-the-radar-preppy-and-totally-east-coast-with-a-touch-of-trendy.” Girls have spent a lifetime achieving just the right ratio of patagonia to vogue. Having a fair interest in fashion myself, I paid attention to what my peers were wearing and began noticing a disturbing trend. Is that girl really wearing boots with fake spurs? Yeah she totally is. That blazer looks suspiciously like a hunt coat. Dansko clogs were definitely sold at tack stores before the nursing population picked up on them. Same goes for Hunter rain boots. EVERYONE has Hunter rain boots. And don’t even get me started on Ralph Lauren. The whole brand is based on pretending to be an equestrian. On that note, I started getting a lot of compliments on my half chaps. Personally I find this a little odd since they are usually covered in an alluring combination of sweat, horsehair, mud, and a touch of manure. Trendy knows no bounds for a determined nineteen-year-old girl. My hallmates asked why I didn’t wear my riding pants to class. Really guys, they aren’t that comfortable.

Recently I was flipping through a magazine and happened upon this lovely creation from Gucci

Whoever guesses where the inspiration came from gets a lifetime supply of carrots brought to you by Hermes.

Those boots look suspiciously similar to a brand called Blundstone, which probably cost a fraction of the price of their Gucci counterparts. To the non-equestrian, I’m sure this is a novel idea for fall boots. Look at the utility! Both short AND tall, in one pair!

In a recent issue of Vogue, I counted no less than six ads featuring horses. This one was my personal favorite (The first photo. More photos from spread on link):

You can see the confusion in his eyes. What is this crazy woman wearing suede hot pants about to do to my nose? Not barn etiquette anywhere in the continental US (might slide in Europe, considerable undercover reporting must ensue).

No other Olympic sport enjoys the iconic fashion status that riding has. You don’t see Dior mass-producing shoulder pads, however they do use crops as a marketing device.

This is the face of determination. I WILL get this couch through the water.

Heels down, sweetie. Perhaps the fashionable nature of riding leads the public to take it less seriously. Most mainstream sports use equipment that adheres to form meets function standards, while riding (with the exception of cross country) leans towards aesthetics rather than utility. I’m not saying that we should abandon the years of tradition that have led to our current show attire. Clearly it is considered the height of fashion and sophistication. I like my stock tie, I mean when I’m wearing it I’m always prepared with a ready-made tourniquet. What other sport can claim to wear its own first aid kit? None that I can think of.

One of my muggle roommates went shopping yesterday. She came home with a pair of leggings complete with full seat patches. I might rethink wearing my breeches to class. I’ll just have to make sure it’s not the pair with holes.

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