Have you ever been in a grocery store, Best Buy, Kmart, or a local cafe and seen an infant that you thought was absolutely hideous looking? I mean, you actually thought how could someone reasonably good looking produce that? C’mon, we’ve all been there. Out of respect and common decency most people see children and/or babies as cute, sweet, adorable, and precious, the list goes on and on. But there are some children who are just not very attractive. Perhaps they grow up to be on the cover of Vogue…who knows? Regardless, these children and infants do exist. I have relatives who are undeniably attractive, and yet some of their offspring are not the cuddliest looking creatures. General rule of thumb: You never EVER tell parents, particularly the mother, that their baby, their pride and joy, and their entire universe is ugly. You just don’t!
Same rules apply in the horse world. Some people are just more blunt than others and voice their opinions, while most equestrians acknowledge this unspoken rule. Let’s be honest, there are certain things you just do not sayabout someone else’s horse and here are a few don’ts…
That horse is ugly. You just don’t say that someone else’s horse is ugly. It may be true, it may not be true. Are all horses created equal? Well, that’s open for debate. For instance, I think I have two very attractive horses, Valonia and Skybreaker. Valonia’s conformation is not perfect, which I vivdly see every single day, though I do think she is lovely. Does everyone else think my mare is the most gorgeous creature in the world? I guarentee you not, but I don’t want to actually hear about it! Skybreaker is one of the most beautiful horses I have ever seen. Some people think he is too much of a hunk, with plates for feet, that his front legs are too short for his body, and he looks like he should be plowing a field….but I don’t want to hear it, because I am infatuated with my horses.
Bad Jumper. For all those trainers, teachers, and coaches, I am sure there are more tactful ways of telling someone their horse SUCKS at jumping. Clearly, not all horses can jump, and not all have impeccable form, and not all are extremely scopey. Haven’t you ever been fence judging, or been watching some cross country at an event, and thought to yourself, “Yikes…that is one horrible jumper.” Yet, this is not something you can openly tell someone, because it’s just not!
Bad Mover. Again, there are more diplomatic ways of telling someone that your dog is a better mover than their horse. Not all horses float like Totilas across the ground, and get perfect scores for movement. It’s really hard to go up to someone and tell them one of the reasons they are nineteenth out of nineteenth in dressage is because their horse is a bad mover. This is not something you can tell someone.
And here are a few more things you just DON’T say about someone else’s horse…
For many, if not most, our horses ARE our infants, our babies, our life, our pride and joy, and we’ll be damned if others don’t like our “children.” Did I forget any other insults, or is the list complete?