Gillian Warner is bringing us along for the ride as she strikes out on her own to launch her business as a professional. You can catch up on more installments from this series here.
I watched as my mare trotted a circle around me, stretching her legs after being relatively stationary with the snow storm that blew in that weekend. She looked good, relaxed.
As her steady hoof beats continued, my mind started to wander. What was next on my list? Did I text my client regarding the change in lesson time? Who should I bring in as a clinician next? What exercise should I set up later? It wasn’t long before the anxiety crept up in my chest and I felt my body tense.
And so did my horse’s.
As the session continued with my encroaching tension, my horse’s performance certainly wasn’t improving – it was even declining. I decided to take a moment, calling her in towards me and asking her to stand. She stopped a few feet away from me, looking and waiting for direction. I closed my eyes, and took a breath.

Working on grounding myself and changing how I interact in my own mind and body has had an impact on how I communicate with horses. Photo by Julia Ellie Photo.
One breath turned into two, turned into three. I decided to count to ten, asking my body to reset and my mind to clear. By the time I reached five, I felt a presence next to me. Erin set her muzzle next to my nose, and took a deep breath with me. I opened my eyes, and sure enough, she had walked closer towards me to rest and breathe together.
We talk so much about how sensitive horses are. From starting so many young horses, it’s clear to me how sensitive to energy they are – the feeling you have in your body, how present you are in the moment, even your breathing. Utilizing your own body language can excite a horse, or quiet a horse. They spend their days reading body language, cues so subtle in their own facial expressions, twitches, and vocalizations that we will never completely understand the complexity of their interactions.
They read your energy too. And are incredibly good at doing so.
That has been one of the most powerful, and the most daunting realizations of my time working with horses. If I can learn to harness and control my own thoughts, feelings, and emotions, I will be better equipped to help my horses. I will be able to show up as a better communicator and partner, helping them find comfort, relaxation, and joy in the work in which we engage.

Photo by Julia Ellie Photo.
If only I can learn to do so.
This realization, and desire to show up as a steady, consistent, and controlled partner, has guided me towards meditation. I started meditation to learn how to find a clear mind to stay present with the horses. While I’m still early into my learning experience, I’m seeing the state of being it can create – a sense of self, a foundational kindness, and a resiliency that becomes how you are, instead of the temporary clear mind I had been seeking.
As part of my routine, I start every day with a brief meditation – just five or ten minutes. I do this before I do anything else (even before I’ve had my coffee!) Taking those few extra minutes has helped ground and center me to approach the day with a steady, patient, and present approach.
Not only do I feel better, but I also feel better equipped to listen and give back to my clients and to approach every training session with a clear and consistent way. I’ve felt more secure in my being, and have felt as though my horses seem to be more secure in their being (despite temperatures in the teens, and incredibly spooky winds!) I can better recognize and utilize my energy, even translating the work to ridden work, where I can “pick up” my energy into a trot, or “settle” my energy back to a walk. My awareness of my own feelings, my body, and my breath has helped me better communicate my intentions, wants, and needs to my horses.

This communication has translated beyond ground work to ridden work as well. Photo by Julia Ellie Photo.
I’m in the early stages of learning and growing in this way, yet so excited to continue to do so. I’m excited about the feeling that I have in my core, I’m excited for the opportunity to show up as a better person for my horses, and I’m excited to see the way the horses have been responding.