The Horse Show Husband Takes On Rolex

My husband Wayne and I recently celebrated our one year anniversary, a significant mile marker in our journey together. In honor of this momentous occasion, we decided to take a trip and enjoy some quality “us time” — away from work, away from the dogs, and most of all … away from the time-consuming, checkbook-leeching horse.

Luckily for Wayne, I am always game for an adventure. Unluckily for Wayne, Rolex fell just two weeks after our anniversary and somehow our weekend getaway turned into a horse-filled escapade with me practically running through vendor row while he cried into his empty wallet.

Of course, I couldn’t simply stand by and let the little golden nuggets of the Horse Show Husbands first ever Rolex slip by without recording these precious memories. So I did what any good horse obsessed wife would do- I created Wayne his own hashtag (#horseshowhusbandtakesonrolex) and documented each hilarious quip, quote, and observation for all of social media to see.

So enjoy, at my wonderful, patient, and loving husbands expense, fellow horse lovers. I present to you, the Horse Show Husband’s first ever trip to Rolex.

“Are you going to let me gamble on these horses?” Wayne asked, followed by my realization that Wayne had NO clue what he was in for this weekend.

“Oh my gosh: this show shirt is only $70!” I said with utter glee.
“WOW, WHAT A DEAL,” he replied, rich with sarcasm.

Upon observing dressage for the first time: “So I can walk a horse in a circle and have thousands of people cheer for me? Jumping a fence is scary, I can do walking in a circle.”

“Is that old guy going to be here?” He was referring to George Morris… I kept all of my comments aside and took it as a bonus that Wayne remembered one of my equestrian idols.

“Hopefully we won’t have to do as much walking today,” he said as we left the hotel on cross country day.

“Thank God these people drink,” he said as we gulped down a mimosa at the Eventing Nation tailgate.

Mimosas made the 8 miles we walked that day a little less tasking…..Photo by Meagan DeLisle

“Soooo…” he said while watching Michael Jung conquer the cross country course, “when do you start doing this again?”

“I don’t, I just do show jumping. I am not gutsy enough for this.”

“Thank God, this is terrifying and I was coming up with thousands of ways to tell you that you couldn’t do this,” he said with a look of terror on his face.

When I asked Wayne what has been his favorite part of Rolex so far, he replied “Well… I watched a horse jump over sticks. That was fun. Watched a horse walk in a fancy circle. That was fun. Got a $9 beer. That was fun.”

At the conclusion of stadium, Wayne was booking it back to the car faster than my little legs could handle. When I asked him to slow down, he provided me with these words of wisdom: “You just lived through three days of heaven, you can deal with ten minutes of hell.”

Wayne booking it to “beat the crowds,” but really I knew he was horsed out for the weekend. Photo by Meagan DeLisle

All in all, Wayne was an absolute trooper and we actually had a blast. He didn’t flinch when the girls at the SmartPak booth knew who he was when it came up in conversation that I was the one who wrote about horse show husbands for Horse Nation. He willingly turned his head as I bought plenty of goodies to bring home for Joey. And he didn’t complain, not ONE time, about the extreme weather changes and the hurry-up-and-wait atmosphere.

He even admitted at the end of the trip that he enjoyed the experience and was glad we decided to go, but followed that up with YOU can come back next year — not WE can come back last year, so I guess he is all Rolexed out for one lifetime. It was just another reminder that we as equestrians truly rely on the support of our loved ones as we pursue our dreams and I am one of the lucky ones.

Go riding and go horse show husbands.