What Once Was Big Is Now Not So Small

Many things have changed over the past six years of going to horse shows and watching Bailey develop as a rider. It is interesting how someone’s perspective can seem to change reality. It makes me think of a story my cousin, Jethro, told me about his neighbor, Clarence.

You see, my cousin Jethro lived across a gully from Clarence and they never really got along. Clarence would come out every morning and shout across the gully at Jethro, “If we ever meet, I am gonna beat you!” That would of course upset Jethro and he would shout back, “No you won’t! If we ever meet I will beat you!”

This went on for years. Well, one day the Department of Motor Vehicles built a bridge over that gully. Jethro’s wife went up to him and said “Now is your chance. Go get Clarence and teach him a lesson.” Jethro agreed and headed out to find Clarence.

Not too long after he had left Jethro came running back into the house and locked the door. His wife asked if he had found his neighbor and taken care of business. Jethro replied, “I was on my way when I got the bridge. There was a sign there that read ‘Clearance – 8 feet 4 inches’, so I ran all the way back home!”

Much like my cousin Jethro, the perspective we have is affected by our experience. I remember when Bailey first started riding Beginner Novice. I would walk the cross country course with her and look at the HUGE Training level jumps and wonder if she would ever be able to jump those.

Then when she first started to run Preliminary courses, the Intermediate and Advanced courses looked impossibly big. Getting to go to Rolex and watch the top riders in the world made it look all the more imposing. And now that she has ridden at the two-star level, Rolex jumps actually look doable. Okay, maybe not all of the Rolex jumps, but some of them.

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As a parent, I see eventing through a different lens then Bailey. I think about how those jumps are going to affect my daughter. I wonder how those immovable objects are going to impact her horse. I think one of the hardest parts is the lack of control over the situation. But then I look back, and truth be told, I have had a lot of control. Being able to prepare her for the ride has been directly within my influence.

Bailey’s mother, Kim, and I have always looked for ways to set her up for success. We have never been the type of parents who could go out and buy her a ready-made, three or four-star horse, but we could find a horse that had the potential and scope to go up the levels with Bailey. We have been able to take our time and find trainers that would put Bailey’s safety first above all things, even if it meant keeping her at a certain level a little bit longer than others her age (more on that in a later blog).

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Photo by Dan Moran.

I would like to take a moment to thank her long time trainer Donna Kinney of Donna Kinney Training Stable in San Antonio. Donna has always put Bailey’s, and just as importantly, her horse’s safety first and we will always be grateful for what she has done to help develop and encourage Bailey to get the most out of her talent.

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Photo by Dan Moran.

When we let our perspective change reality is when we can get into trouble. Bailey and I were talking this past weekend while she was schooling cross country with her young OTTB mare about how the jumps that we thought were huge a few years ago now don’t look so big.

This makes the current level of jumps maybe not look so imposing. But the fact is they are big. They are tall and wide. They still don’t move. They deserve a high level of respect from both the rider and the horse.

And as long as Bailey rides, I will constantly be doing everything I can to help her have the safest ride possible. I might not be able to affect what happens once she is on the course and the clock is ticking but up to that point I can make sure she has the best protective gear, the best training, and the best support system she can have so that she can be as successful as possible.

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Photo by Dan Moran.

Sometimes the measure of success is not found in a ribbon. We can never forget this is a dangerous sport that we have allowed our children to take part in. So, before every show we ask that all our friends pray for safe and fun rides for all the riders at the show. And in this sport, any time that you can walk away from a show with a smile on your face and healthy horse is a huge success in my book.

Follow Eventing Dad on Twitter @eventingdad

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