In today’s world, it often feels like we’re viewing each other’s lives through the filter of a highlight reel. We see the perfect trips, the flawless jumps, and the moments polished enough for social media. What we rarely talk about is the pressure this creates for athletes on both sides of the screen.
Riders—whether professional or amateur—can feel an unspoken obligation to post content that makes them look successful and impressive. Meanwhile, as we scroll through these posts, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking the sport is all smooth sailing. This distorted perception can leave riders feeling like if they’re not succeeding all the time, they may not be cut out for the sport.
With Between the Ears, I want to peel back that facade and dive into the real, often unspoken challenges riders face in the eventing world. Through these conversations, we’ll explore what it truly means to navigate the ups and downs of the sport.
In this edition of Between the Ears, I had the pleasure of catching up with Meghan O’Donoghue, an international 5* event rider known for her journey with two remarkable off-the-track Thoroughbreds (OTTBs), Pirate and Palmer. Meghan’s business, Meghan O’Donoghue Eventing, is based in Round Hill, VA during the warmer months and Ocala, FL in the winter. Before launching her own venture, she worked for two accomplished riders who have represented the US Team at major competitions, Jan Byyny and Will Coleman, gaining invaluable experience. Meghan’s career has taken her around the world, including being named as a traveling alternate for the 2014 World Equestrian Games in France. Her story is one of resilience and dedication as she navigates the challenges of ‘making it’ with OTTBs in the competitive equestrian world.
With that, let’s go between the ears…
[To read more Between the Ears interviews, click here]
Meghan O’Donoghue and Palm Crescent. Photo by Tilly Berendt.
Can you tell me about how you got your start in eventing?
I was born into a “horsey” family—both my parents are deeply involved in eventing. They own and run an eventing business in Carbondale, Illinois, where they’ve been sharing their love for horses and introducing people to riding. Growing up with this exposure, my sister and I had an incredible opportunity to immerse ourselves in the equestrian world from an early age. It was more than just a hobby; it became a lifestyle supported by my parents, who encouraged us every step of the way.
My journey started at our family facility, but I knew I had to branch out and grow independently to pursue a professional career. That led me eastward, where I had the privilege of working for Jan Byyny and later with Will Coleman. Those years were like my “horse university.” Working under such respected professionals opened doors for me and led to some significant milestones, including my first five-star event. From there, it was a natural progression to start my own business, and that’s what I’m doing today. Each experience has built on the last, leading me to where I am now in my career.
Can you tell me about a time that you lost your confidence for riding or competing? How did you overcome it?
Interestingly, confidence is a journey. When I was younger, I went through a phase where I felt uncertain about my future in horses. I’d see my parents working tirelessly to sustain a business in such a demanding industry, and it made me wonder if I could or should follow that path. There was a moment in high school where I even considered different career options. I did a couple of years at community college, trying to explore other paths, but nothing resonated with me the way horses did. I quickly realized that the challenges and uncertainties were worth it because my passion for horses ran too deep.
During times of self-doubt, I’ve leaned heavily on my support system—my family and close friends. They’ve always believed in me, even when I questioned myself. Remembering why I fell in love with horses in the first place and focusing on that passion helped me regain my confidence. When my confidence wavers now, I try to remember that this journey is about the love of the horse first and foremost.
Meghan O’Donoghue and Pirate. Photo by Jenni Autry.
Have you ever experienced burnout? Why? What tools did you use to get through it?
Absolutely. Burnout is almost inevitable in a sport as intense and demanding as eventing. Working in someone else’s program for extended periods, there were definitely days that felt repetitive or exhausting. The physical demands, the ups and downs of competition, and the long hours took a toll, and I realized that I needed to balance my drive with moments of rest and enjoyment.
One pivotal time for me was when I started team roping on the side, which gave me a completely different way to experience horses. It wasn’t about the pressure to compete at the highest level; it was a social, relaxed environment, and that outlet really helped me reconnect with the joy of just being around horses without any expectations. I discovered that it’s possible to love horses in a lighter, less intense way, and that helped me avoid burnout in eventing. Now, if I ever feel burnt out, I remind myself that I can always find ways to enjoy horses beyond the competition arena.
What was one of the biggest obstacles you had to overcome in the sport?
One of the biggest challenges has been competing with limited resources. I don’t come from a wealthy family, so I’ve had to make the most of every opportunity and every horse. For instance, my first five-star horse, Pirate, was a very inexpensive Thoroughbred. He wasn’t the fanciest horse out there, but he gave me my start at the highest levels of the sport. I had to rely on hard work, grit, and a lot of support from my family and mentors to get there.
It can also be a lot of pressure to have just one horse you are campaigning at the top. It can feel very selfish and all consuming. This spring, I went to Badminton with Palmer and ended up falling off on XC. It’s moments like those that make you wish you had another horse to go to the next event with and keep cracking on.
Overcoming this obstacle taught me resilience and appreciation for every step of the journey. I’ve learned to make the most out of what I have, and I’m grateful for every opportunity that comes my way. Having fewer resources might seem like a disadvantage, but it’s also been a driving force in my career. I’ve had to be resourceful, strategic, and committed—and that’s made me a better rider and a stronger person.
What advice do you have for someone in the sport who is currently facing adversity?
Meghan O’Donoghue and Palm Crescent. Photo by Shelby Allen.
One of the best pieces of advice I can give is to lean on the community around you. The eventing community is full of supportive, knowledgeable people who have likely faced similar struggles. Don’t be afraid to reach out, share your challenges, and ask for advice. Often, you’ll find someone who’s been through something similar and can offer you a new perspective or some encouragement to keep going.
Also, remember that setbacks are part of the journey. Whether it’s a financial obstacle, an injury, or a horse that’s out of commission, these hurdles can feel overwhelming. But try to focus on what you have rather than what you lack. Remind yourself of the people who support you, the horses you have, and the goals you’re working toward. In adversity, sometimes it’s about keeping your focus on the things you can control and taking each day one step at a time.
Are there any routines or rituals you do at horse shows?
Yes, I definitely have a few rituals. Before each show, I like to take a quiet moment to visualize the course and see myself riding it confidently. It’s a grounding exercise that helps calm my nerves and puts me in the right mindset for the day. I also find it helpful to set small goals for myself—things I want to achieve with each ride, separate from the results.
After each ride, I make a point to thank my horse. No matter the outcome, I try to recognize the effort my horse has put in. These moments of gratitude are essential for me. They remind me that, win or lose, I’m fortunate to be able to do what I love with incredible animals by my side. Another thing I do is focus on my support team. My family, my fiancé, and the team of girls in the barn are always there for me, and they’re part of every success. I keep them close, both physically and mentally, as a reminder that I’m never alone in the journey.
Competing in eventing has been a journey filled with challenges, doubts, and incredible triumphs. For anyone out there facing their own struggles in the sport, know that you’re not alone. Keep your passion for the horses close, lean on the community around you, and remember to celebrate the small victories along the way. That’s what keeps the dream alive.
