We announced the 10 Blogger Contest finalists yesterday, and now we’re bringing you their awesome entries from Round 1 here on Bloggers Row. I will be posting all 10 entries over the next few days, so be sure to check them out and leave your feedback in the comments.
All entries will be reprinted without editing for fairness’ sake. Thanks again for your support and readership, EN! We are so thrilled to have such quality entries this year.
Entrant: @RolexHusband
Bio: Live in Christiansburg Virginia and started @RolexHusband in an attempt to pass the time during dressage while we attend Rolex. This has inspired me to see what more I can evolve this into and Eventing Nation may be a HUGE part of that because you guys are awesome. I have been married to my wonderful bride for 11 years this June. When we first started dating; I had no idea about the horses. WOW, was I in for a shocker. However, I decided early on that if I was going to be able to spend time with my wife, then I should take a vested interest in horses. I am president of our local USEA affiliate (horse people need help managing things), put on horse shows and clinics, and in general am very in touch with what is going on in the Eventing community. I have my opinions and often share with an unfiltered perspective. I believe that I can bring a totally different perspective and angle to your site but will present an educated approach.
Entry: The “EveryMan’s Guide to being a successful “Horse Husband”
Gentlemen! So you met that special someone and she loves to ride horses and does this thing called Eventing. Congratulations! Horse women (as I am sure you have found) are intelligent, athletic, competitive, attractive and a little neurotic (this adds to the appeal)! If you are thinking this is turning into a long term deal; there are several principles that you will want to understand and embrace. Let’s talk about a few…
#1. Something will ALWAYS COST MORE MONEY. Whether she is looking for the latest piece of tack (There is always a “latest and greatest”), shopping for supplements, or needing the vet to come out (If you ever hear: “I think we need his hocks injected”… look out buddy… I will explain this in another post); it will ALWAYS cost more money. I almost needed a second mortgage when I found out how much the horse’s supplements were a month! Now, I have reached inner peace with the acceptance of this principle.
#2 Your friends will not understand this “Eventing”……and that is okay. You can try to explain to your buddies at work all of your newfound knowledge but above over exaggerating the amount of beer you will consume during a show weekend or agreeing how hot horse girls are; you only need to focus on these 2 things:
- #1. “Yeah it’s what they show on TV a lot during the Olympics”. Don’t underestimate this. Your friend’s wife doesn’t do anything that cool. When they ask if your wife or girlfriend will ever go to the Olympics; just play it cool and make a joke about all the stuff costing you money from principle #1.
- #2 “It is like a triathlon for horses and they jump these really big jumps the size of a truck”. People understand triathlons and jumping trucks. Now, it doesn’t matter if your significant other is only going Green at a local horse show because your friend will not have the attention span for you to explain things like “Green” or “Beginner Novice”. If your buddy asks if your wife races horses, smack him in the face because he is a moron.
#3 Get a Camera….and don’t skimp here. YOU EARNED THIS BIG GUY. Horse women love photos of themselves jumping around on their horse. Cameras are fun to play around with. Also, you can be at a local horse show and be the most popular dude there if you snap a few practice shots of other horse women and give them photos. You are a HERO. I have also been known to use the “I am sorry babe, I can’t hold your horse while you braid or untack him because I have my expensive camera in hand”
#4 Don’t dress like a tool. Just don’t. You are at a horse show, not a frat party or Ralph Lauren event. The nice white shirt, aviator glasses, and boat shoes are not appropriate. Horses poop; you will step in it. They also rub their heads on you and will break the glasses and muddy your new white polo. You may be reading this and say: “Naw, Bro…that’s not me” Well it is. So stop.
Keep all of these in mind and you are well on the way of being a “supportive horse husband”. Also, one day…you CAN BUY A BOAT WITH NO OBJECTION! Only catch: you won’t have time to use it!
Cheers!
