If Horses Made New Year’s Resolutions

While you’re busy making a list of self-improvements for the upcoming year, your horse may just be doing the same thing. As much as we love them, surely there are some things we’d put on our horses’ resolution list. If horses were the type to make New Year’s resolutions, here are some we’d most likely see, along with a look back at some of our favorite naughty horses from the last decade:

I promise to not start a fight at feeding times (only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays).

I promise not to paw in the water trough for hours but then refuse to set foot in the water jump.

I promise not to roll within 15 minutes after a bath (anything after 16 minutes is fair game).

I promise not to spook at plastic bags. Or minis. Or cars. Or leaves. Or my own shadow.

I promise not to impersonate a giraffe in our dressage tests (but only if the judge seems nice).

I promise to jump everything on the first (or second) attempt.

I promise not to run too far away if my rider falls off (though I take zero responsibility for the fall itself).

I promise not to use manure as a pillow (but, really, have you tried it?).

I promise to keep my fly mask on and not shred my blankets, no matter how much my friends make fun of me for wearing them.

I promise to stop practicing my flying during the trot-up. Rumor has it that this is frowned upon, but it sure makes for a great photo.

Cheers to a happy, successful 2020 full of wide open cross country courses and well-behaved horses!