EN blogger finalist Yvette Seger is back with more Tips for Eventers Living in Itty-Bitty Apartments in the City. Yvette will always be remembered for the famous Insane Walmart Ride, and we welcome her contributions to Eventing Nation.
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From Yvette:
Tips for Eventers Living in Itty-Bitty Apartments in the City: The Lunch Lady Edition
This poster is the reason why Pony Clubbers are awesome!
(Photo courtesy of Seneca Valley Pony Club member Hannah Recknor, captain of the “Hairnetting Hipsters” team at the 2012 Capital Region Dressage Rally)
WHAZZZZZZZUP EVENTING NATION??!!!???
Erm…sorry…I must have hit the caffeine a bit hard today at the office.
Well, I don’t know about you guys, but I’m 5 weeks out from my last competition of 2012, and I’m much closer to attaining insanity that I was when I was galloping at solid objects framed by red flags on the right and white flags on the left. See, for nine months of the year, “I’m starting a new project,” means that someone’s handed me the reins to a nice beastie that is a little short on work. During the dark, dreary days of winter, however, that phrase usually translates to, “Hey, we’ve got this big mamma-jamma contract that needs to be fulfilled, and oh, by the way, the client is expecting 50 gajillion data points in two days.” *Sigh* Makes competing a stubby-legged pony in an Open Novice division here in Area II look like a cakewalk. (And yes, my dear Twix-pony, mommy loves you…stubby little legs and all!)
To keep myself from going totally bonkers, I use this downtime from events to get everything organized for next season. Thus far, I’ve managed to get all the competition saddlepads washed and put away (read: stuffed in a bag in the corner of my apartment), cleaned and stored what seems like 50 pairs of brushing boots (really, only 8 pairs, and they’re stuffed into the trunk of my car), and taken the obligatory end of season shower with my cross country vest (hopefully the apple scent will fade a bit, otherwise I fear that the aforementioned stubby-legged pony might confuse it with a treat.)
With my dressage coat at the cleaners until I scrounge up enough cash to pay the piper remember to actually pick it up and my first competition of 2013 a few months away, I figured it was safe to venture into (dum-dum-duuuuuum) the garment bag Pocket of Doom. (Don’t judge, people – you KNOW have random/unidentifiable crap in your garment bags, too!) This year’s adventure into the Pocket of Doom yielded 1 abandoned sock, a balled up pair of gloves, 11 safety pins, and 7 hairnets.
Ahhh, hairnets! The bane of my existence! The ones that are small enough actually fit my miniscule cranium are too wussy to hold up to a rider’s demands, while the overpriced versions sold in tack shops seem to be made to accommodate a Hollywood starlet’s head full of hair extensions (yes, I’m self-conscious of my scrawny locks). Throughout my riding career, I’ve tried to contain my wispy blonde ponytail using pretty much every hairnet option on the market, with mixed results. Which brings me to this week’s tip…
Tip for Eventers Living in Itty-Bitty Apartments in the City #18:
While it’s true that hairnets are an essential part of every long-haired eventer’s existence (or should be, you sloppy punks), I strongly recommend that you do not engage in conversations with food service personnel (aka “lunch ladies“) about hairnet brands, durability or fit. Trust me, they will think you’re mocking them, and it won’t end well for you (or your food).
