Horse-ownership, we tell ourselves and our normal, non-equestrian friends, is an endless treasure trove of joys. There are all those soothing hacks, the crunching of autumn leaves underhoof; there’s that incomparably soothing sound of a barn full of horses munching hay as you close up for the night. There’s all those days out competing, which, like the daydream fodder that came before them, always end with tears of joy, an armload of prizes, and the awed respect of all our peers.
Wait, who the heck are we kidding?! Horse-ownership is like performing an at-home black-market kidney removal, popping the excised organ into a gift box, and handing it to your vet. Do you really need the second one, either? Because honey, you’re going to need something to appease the farrier, who’s got wind of the fact that the vet’s getting the VIP treatment and has subsequently struck a deal with your horse that means you’re seeing him far more regularly than you’d really have hoped for. And if your horse is in one piece with all four shoes attached to all four hooves, and all four hooves more or less connected to functional limbs? You better believe that’s your moment to fall apart at the seams. Fortunately, you’re in great company, as our latest batch of #EventerProblems proves.
Don’t forget to tag ’em with #EventerProblems for inclusion in a future edition! Go Eventing.